Music

I want you to do something. Another thing. I know, I'm constantly asking you to do things, but this is the most effective thing I've asked you to do so far. It will teach you something. I can almost promise you.

Next time you're on the bus alone, or bored at home, or just not doing anything that could necessarily distract you, I want you to listen to a song. I want you to listen to a song that you haven't listened to since a certain period in your life, but you used to listen to it a lot then. Just a song you played on repeat, day after day, preferably from about a year ago. Something you haven't listened to in a while. For example, I would play "The Best Day" by Taylor Swift to represent my 6th grade year, or I'd play "Seasons of Love" from RENT to represent summer camp 2011. Anyway, just choose a song, and listen to it. Either close your eyes, stare at something, or look out a window. Try not to think about anything, just listen. If you chose the right song, and are doing it right, you should get to the point where all the memories—or, more importantly, the emotions—of that period of time will come flooding back to you. Your heart may hurt, or you may feel something. Resent, anger, hurt, or longing. Or maybe a happy emotion, like excitement, surprise, or love. You'll feel something. Not because of the song you chose, and the lyrics in it or the music, but because you listened to it during that time period. Music has an effect on people that way. You may feel so much pain that you have to turn it off. That happened to me.

I was sitting on the bus, looking out the window, not talking to anyone, but listening to music, as usual. I decided to listen to Sweeney Todd that day. I chose "Green Finch and Linnet Bird". As the first few notes flew into my ears, my heart literally started hurting. I honestly felt a pang of emotion. My mind went back to the memory of standing backstage left, with Hannah, watching Anna perform that song on the top of a wagon with the yellow light glowing on her. I had to change the song, just because I missed that show so much. It was too emotional for me to take. I missed spending nights until 11 at the theatre, wearing my long skirt and reversible vest, pushing wagons and setting up the stage. I missed hanging out in the costume loft with the other techs, taking pictures and just talking. I missed meeting weird people when ushering. I missed that show. I still do. The music affected me. It sounds cliche, but it did.

The thing I learned about listening to that music, was although it reminded me of a time I miss, it reminded me what that time taught me. It reminded me of what it did for me. Listening to that music made me realize how many friends I made, and what I had started, just that one show. And I couldn't be more grateful to have been a part of that. It changed me, and my life, for the better.

So, just please listen to the music. It could remind you or lessons learned, or teach you a new one. It could change you. Maybe when you hear it, you'll hear yourself in it also.