I've always felt like second chances were incredibly stupid. Not because we shouldn't give someone more chances, but because of the number of chances we give them when we give them a "second chance". We should always give people more than one chance to be a good person, or a good friend, but two is way too little! There is not ONE person that will shape up to be a perfect person in two tries. Not one. Why? Because we're human, and we make mistakes. Have you ever heard the term, "Learn from your mistakes"? That's very true. We all make mistakes, things happen. The important thing is that we learn from them, and not do them again. That's where 'forgiveness' comes in.
Forgiveness is what shapes our lives. It's what can either can make or break a friendship, or relationship of any kind. Because, again, we all make mistakes. If someone does you wrong, it's because they're human. It's only natural. If it's an accident, they didn't mean to hurt you. They didn't want to do what they did. After they apologize, believe them. If they've never given you a reason to call them a bad friend before, why do that now? Trust that they've learned from what they did, and they'll never do it again. Being mad at them or holding a grudge won't do anything. It won't change what happened. You won't go back in time to fix it. It happened, so let it. You can't do anything about it. If anything, being mad would make it even worse. Then the person you're mad at is upset, and the you're not happy. You can't be mad and happy at the same time. Which would you rather be? Forgive them, because being mad won't do anything but make the situation worse.
On that note, if you're the person that needs to be forgiven, and not the one that needs to forgive, sometimes the other person can be stubborn. Sometimes they might not want to forgive you. They'll say, "I've had enough!" and walk away. They just won't forgive you. That's where the other word comes in: acceptance.
Not being accepted, but accepting. Accepting the fact that this person is just not going to forgive you. Now, before I tell you anything else about acceptance, I want to tell you: By apologizing, and taking that initiative, YOU ARE THE BIGGER PERSON. By trying to talk to them, and trying to make amends, you are being the better one. It's not your fault if they don't forgive you, you've done all you can. So, before you start to come down hard on yourself because you're not forgiven, know that they're the ones that are being immature.
Back to what I was saying about acceptance: If they're not going to forgive you, then they're not going to forgive you. It's that simple. You've done all that you can, and can do no more. Sometimes, in a relationship of any kind, no is stronger than yes. You can't make them forgive you. You can't make them be friends with them again. You have to accept that. Once you do, you'll be much happier. I'm not going to lie: you'll probably look back at the past, and shed a tear or two. Your heart will probably hurt remembering the good times and knowing that they no longer exist. But would you rather be upset about them not forgiving you your whole life, or eventually accept it, and move on? What's done is done, and it is what it is. You can't change it, so why worry about trying?
Forgive those you can, and accept what it is. At the end of the day, you'll be a lot happier.
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